Nice
by Marie Suzette
Summary: A character study on Molly Weasley


Molly would never admit it to anybody, but she is secretly mean at heart. She has known this since she was a small child, and disliked other, prettier girls just because they were better. But even at a small age, Molly knew that the feelings of dislike weren't justified, and weren't nice, and so she befriended those girls and they became some of her best friends at Hogwarts.

Molly feels guilty every time she thinks a mean thought, even now that she is old and matronly and allowed to be disapproving. But the guilt is strong, and so when Sirius died and she thought _Good, now he won't be a bad influence on my children anymore_ she was horrified with herself, and never mentioned her thoughts to anybody (not that she ever did) and forced herself to feel nothing but sorrow at Sirius's death. Sometimes, she wasn't quite as good at hiding her feelings, as in the case with Fleur. But she did hide her thoughts when Fleur pronounced that the wedding was still on, those thoughts that said _Damn, and I thought no more Fleur would be the silver lining in this incident with Bill_ or _I wouldn't marry him if he looked like that, wonder why she would_ and even _Thank God somebody will be giving me grandkids soon_. But she was nothing but happy and repentant on the outside, because that's all she allowed herself to be, because she would never actually think thoughts like that and actually _mean_ them.

But that didn't change the fact that she did think them, so when she heard that Snape killed Dumbledore, her first thought was _Thank God he won't be around anymore and I won't worry about either of them reading my mind_, followed by the appropriate shock/horror/dismay/etc. Dumbledore had always told her that actions meant more than thoughts, so she ignored her thoughts and pretended they didn't happen and was firmly motivated to be nice and kind and everything opposite of her thoughts.

But sometimes, she sat down and wondered if Percy's defection was her fault. She had smothered him with attention, she knew, so that he became somewhat of a mama's boy, but that was because he was the first of the Unwanted Children, though she never even dared think that in her head.

Molly Prewett had always known that she was going to have a brief but brilliant career before resigning and taking on the fulltime job of wife and mother instead. She knew she wanted to be a housewitch, just never realized she would have to become one so soon. But, regardless, she was happy about Bill, and happier about Charlie.

She had only ever wanted two children. The day she found out about Percy, she thought _Crap, I wonder if it's too late to get rid of him_ and was horrified at her thoughts. Fred and George warranted _Fuck, twins, the last thing I need to deal with right now I've already got my hands full with Bill and Charlie and Percy_, and Ron, Ron was almost the last straw. She thought _How can one man suck this much at Contraceptus Charms?_ When she found out that she was pregnant with Ginny, she thought _He must be doing it on purpose, he couldn't have screwed up this many times_ and never said anything and always acted delighted about her children.

But from then on, _she_ cast the Contraceptus Charm each time.

Molly always knew she would choose to be a housewitch one day, but you can't blame her for being slightly bitter that she never exactly had a choice. She was pregnant with Bill, and there was nothing else to do, and so much for a brief career; she just skipped directly to the wife and mother part. And she would have chosen that immediately any day. Only problem was, she never had a choice. Sometimes, her thoughts turn resentful. On days when all the children were being loud and obnoxious, she sometimes thought _Why can't they all just go away or shut up or something, I hate kids_ even though it wasn't true.

The morning after Bill and Fleur's wedding, when it turned out that Harry and Ron and Hermione were gone, Molly thought _Damn, so that was what they were planning and I just thought they were up to illicit sexual activities, they really pulled the wool over my eyes this time, I'm just getting so old_ but she said, "Oh, why didn't they tell anyone? We would have helped them." She thought _I hope if Hermione and Ron have sex they remember to use protection and that Ron is better at the charm than his dad was because if Hermione comes back knocked up, there won't be anything I can do about it_, but she said, "Oh, and Hermione is the only girl all alone out there with two boys; whatever will she do?" She thought _If they die out there we'll never know and we'll just assume that they're alive and sit here waiting until Voldemort comes along and kills us, and I hope he kills me first I just want to get this all over with_, but she said, "They will come back safely, won't they?" She thought _We're all going to die if we're depending on three hormone-drive teenagers to save the world_, but she said, "They're too young to bear this burden on their shoulders."

Molly liked that she wasn't actually that bitter, cynical voice inside her, that she had enough control to never blurt out those horrid comments she's always thinking. On the outside, she is the perfect mother and ever-so-sweet-and-caring.

So when she smiled tearily and said, "We'll just have to trust them then, won't we?" nobody suspected that she was really thinking _Well at least they helped ruin Fleur's wedding, I never really liked her anyways_.


End file.
